It’s tough, that loneliness, that seeming stark despair when all else fails & falls away.  It’s gut wrenching tough when all else fails, when that feeling of abandonment of all meaning, all friends, foes, lovers, of all reason for living, pervades like a chill thick fog rolling over what was, just seconds before, a warm comforting sun.  That it, life & death, is so hard, at times so cruel & unjust, as it may appear to be in actuality, in that all too real appearance of sheer horror & depravity, ultimately serves humanity to bring us to that irreversible edge of despair, that precipice of irreducible loneliness, in order that we may surely find that true truth reality of that great effulgent singular singularity that that, that I am is.  In that, that singularity of be’ng that center centered centrality of that I am, we must be complete, a completion in which any na thing may seem to be added or subtracted only when denied as denial, d’na, & thus we may appear to be of such as that, that sum thing is missing.  In that denial, that d’na of that I am, we may feel & think of that I am as “that I am (is) lonely”.  That potential for loneliness in a complete universe, a universe that is in front, behind, to the right & to the left, above, below, & all around, is eve’n possible is due to complete non-attachment, complete non-objectivity of the subject subjective subjectivity of that, that that I am is no matter where in the universe it may appear, no matter what planet or system it may appear to be in or of, no matter in what body; causal, subtle, or gross, it may appear to form & inform as d’na.

Unfortunately, all too often, given this cosmic opportunity, we may chose as though(t) to throw ourself ‘under the bus’, back into that un-manifest, undifferentiated sacred darkness causality divine re; there & then as though(t) a gain & loss, to re-emerge, hopefully, painfully, & bloodily into another life of trial & error & terror to eat once more of the ‘bread of sorrow’.  Then, as now, maybe, just maybe, we might feel burdened enough, hurt & abandoned enough, desperate enough, to ask why, why that I am (is) appearing to disappear.

Then as now, given the tenacity & a bit of good luck, we may discover that, that that I am is, in operational & practical fact, a sacred vow to surely find that, that that I am is all along, reality now realized realization of such as (ka)now(ing) so richly deserved by being that desired desire, de-from sideras, from star’e(t) to finish.  That ain’t all bad.  Yet not adhering to that vow, ignoring that vow, may lead to confusion, doubt, & turmoil, if we’re lucky.  Worse yet, it may lead to diversionary outward temporal success, further blinding us to that far greater reward in that divine re-word of realization / liberation.

All that I am saying is give yod / you / that, that that I am is, a chance.